scattered leaves don't lie

hmmm...autumn is so beautiful. we had two days of strangely warm weather - last night i biked home at 9 o'clock at night in a t-shirt...and i was too hot! but today is a rainy bc-esque kind of day. but then i'm trying not to be too happy about hot weather in late october; chances are it's not necessarily a good thing nor is it a sign of good things.

i think taking a diploma in the environment is exacerbating my anxiety problems. sometimes i wake up in the middle of the night in a panic, trying to catch my breath. i dream of environmental collapse, of world war, of resource wars, of panic and tidal waves and all such things.

but then i try to put things into perspective. we talked about other mass extinctions and the resilience of life in class. even if we destroy ourselves and most of life on earth, there will always be some extremophile who persists and from the chaos life will emerge again. isn't that lovely? it's reassuring in a way, though perhaps not for humanity. but life! it's such an amazing thing. the universe is creative! (sorry, i'm in the middle of midterms. i can only think in terms of concepts i'm learning. not that i really understand them)

anyways, i'm not sure i have a point. but then, nothing has a point, the only point to anything is life itself, the creation of life, the extension of life! yippeee!